It's 3am and you're still awake because...

Something big is about to happen. Like really big. And the universe doesn’t want you to sleep through it. Except the universe isn’t sure if it’s scheduled for tonight, or tomorrow, or the day after. Let’s not risk missing it okay?

You have a heightened level of brain activity. It is physically impossible for your awesome brain to shut down so early. It is also physically impossible for your brain to function before noon.

If you don’t get a meal at this time of the night, your life will be meaningless.

You don’t know it yet, but you’re part of this secret cult that meets at this hour. They call out to you every night, it’s time you pay more attention to those voices.

You were an owl in your past life.

You are still an owl, disguised as a human being.

The stars need you to watch over them.

You like to watch people sleep.

And let's face it, it may be 3am at your end. But it's 5pm somewhere else in the world :)

Here's one of Benedict Cumberbatch, because why not.

The Native Outcast

At one of my favorite cosmetic stores.

Saleslady: Hi, po.
Me: Hello.
Saleslady: Ano ba ang hinahanap mo? Lipstick? Eyeshadow?
Me: Ahh.. I'm just looking for concealer.
Salelady: Oh! I'm sorry. I thought you are Filipino.
Me: I am. I just can't speak it.
Saleslady: Why not? All Filipino should know how to speak Tagalog. Is your father a foreigner?
Me: .... umm.. the concealer?


Just a rendition of one of the many episodes I have. Sometimes it's worse and sometimes it's not. However, it doesn't change the fact that my own kin observe me as an alien.

Growing up, I was heavily influenced by my peers rather than my parents. English was my main language in and out of our home. Overtime, I began to understand Bisaya and Tagalog from listening intently to my parents and relatives. The end result? A pure-bred Filipina who speaks fluent English and understands the Filipino language BUT doesn't speak it.

What I considered to be perfectly normal was strange for many of our family friends and new people we meet. The consensus among Filipinos (and for many others) is that every 'Kabayan' must know the language. The failure to do so is enough to be considered a side-show. (Ok, maybe that's exaggerating it.)

One may find it naive and frustrating on how narrow-minded many people may be. I am aware not every one is like that. BUT!... I've encountered too many to shrug it aside. Being a person without the ability to converse in their native tongue may and can result in the following:

1. Assumed as a half-Filipino (usually with a rich foreign father)
2. The topic of many starter conversations - of course done in the native tongue because they assume you don't understand.
3. The attention of many speculative stares when you speak english fluently to your Filipino parents.
4. Not being included in interesting conversations with peers or co-workers. (plainly because they can't gossip in english and get away with it.)

(I may or may not have encountered 2 or more of the above)

Half the battle is understanding the language and interpreting it so you're aware of what is being said. The other half is coping with emotions of feeling alienated from your own kinsmen.

The obvious solution would be to learn the language. Sadly, I'm not motivated enough to. English is more than enough for me. Being able to understand what my parents tell me in Bisaya is enough. Hey, it's a personal preference.

Over the years, I have collected a small group of friends (non-Filipinos) and found myself more at home in a multinational society than in my own nationality. English is the main form of communication - and even when a couple of my friends share a second language, they won't hesitate to translate it.

Being mentally branded as an outcast - yes, 'mentally' - I allowed myself to explore and learn the world around me. I observed and questioned other cultures, people and behaviours. What makes them tick; Why they act the way they do; Why stereotypes are formed and are they true? The result - a broadened perspective of our mixed society and the ability to hold a semi-objective understanding of the cultures and ethnicities around us.

Despite feeling like a 'freak-show' around my 'Kabayans', I feel utterly relieved to have been raised as I am. I'd like to think I grew up with a minimal sassy, typical personality most Filipinas tend to have in their teens. Nor do I hold a bias against other nationalities as many do.

I was educated in non-Filipino schools, hung around a majority of non-Filipinos as I grew up and spoke no other language except English. Yes, I was seen as different. Perhaps people felt intimidated to approach and talk to me because of the language difficulty. I don't blame them. None of us can completely control the way we were raised or how much exposure we had to either language. As my cousins love saying, we cause 'nosebleeds' in an attempt to understand each other.

Nevertheless, I'm rather proud of the way I was raised. Despite feeling alone among my kin, I have never felt inadequate. I may have referred to myself as an outcast. Let's tweak that a bit...

I'm a Proud Native Outcast.


-L

*Disclaimer: This post is not intended as an insult to the Filipino community. It is a young woman's personal opinion drawn from previous experiences in life. I love being Filipino. Nevertheless, take it as you see fit.

Review: Thursday Plantation 100% Pure Tea Tree Oil

Pimples, white heads, acne... the bane of our teens. A few lucky ones can escape them, but not most of us. Me included. Cosmetic companies make millions of dollars feeding off the insecurities of the young who are on the endless quest to achieve perfect skin.

Let's face it, there is no way we can get that perfect flawlessness that the media constantly shoves at our faces. But we try. So we buy creams and pay for expensive treatments. We lean on the promises, claims, harsh chemicals to help us.

But what if you didn't need all that? What if all you needed was time and one natural product to aid you?

It look me a while, but I found my staple for these nasty pimples.

This is a quick review for the Thursday Plantation 100% Pure Tea Tree Oil.

Tea Tree Oil is a natural antiseptic that was used mainly for first aid purposes in wars. Its healing properties caused enough of a stir for cosmetologists to consider incorporating it in skin care products - but to a certain percentage.

The product comes in a brown tinted bottle with a secure screw on/off cap. It resembles that much like an medicinal ointment in packaging. The label is green with directions on how to use it. Under the cap, there appears to be a dropper-like feature designed to dispense the clear liquid in small quantities.

The product is available in 10ml, 25ml and 50ml bottles. It bears the strong scent of tea tree. The oil is watery, hence easy to spread. It can be found in most pharmacies such as Boots. The 25ml bottle retails at AED 80 in the UAE.

Final conclusion and personal experience

I didn't discover the benefits of tea tree oil until about 2 years ago on Youtube - after which, I had gone though about five 10ml bottles of the Body Shop oil before discovering Thursday Plantation. The difference is outstanding. I was amazed at the results and haven't even finished my first bottle.

I use this on a daily basis on pimples, small cuts, reddened areas and so on. The scent is very strong and not recommend for those who have very sensitive skin or smell - opt for the Body Shop one instead. I do recommend that you mix one drop of this with your moisturizer to minimize the effect. The result is well worth it. It absorbs into the skin fairly well and doesn't contribute to any additional oiliness. I have noticed that it prevents pimples from coming to full term. In fact, in about a day or two, the pimple would have almost dried out or greatly reduced in size.

Other than the slight stinging upon applying and that the dropper that may dispense more than you'd expect, this product is clearly a goldmine. It is all natural and easily accessible. 

In conclusion, yes, I would recommend this to anyone suffering from acne or painful pimples. I would also advise to dilute it first with a cream or water to lessen the stinging effect. I have seen a greater difference in the past 3 months than I have in the last year.

Although if you wish to go natural at a cheaper expense, change your lifestyle, diet and thinking. Nothing heals better than the inside out.


-L

Review: Garnier BB Cream - Combination to Oily Skin

Every cosmetic brand out there is on a mission to perfect that one product that would make our skin look as naturally flawless as possible. Foundations, concealers, anti-aging creams, serums... the list goes on!

A recent addition to the Middle Eastern cosmetic market are the BB creams (Beauty/Blemish Balm) and CC creams (Color Correcting). BB creams are meant to be a hybrid between a moisturizer, a sunscreen and a foundation. In short, good for the skin and lightweight, but decent coverage.

As always, I'm on the hunt for something light, but pigmented to replace my concealer and liquid foundation. And, oh boy, was I jumping for joy when I realized THIS BB cream was finally being sold here.

This is a review on the Garnier Skin Naturals BB Cream Miracle Skin Perfector for Combination to Oily Skin. (phew!)

The product is packaged in a rectangular box to fit the tube's elongated shape. The claims and product details are printed on the front and sides of the box.When opened, the tube is stored upright instead of on its cap. It's a normal squeeze tube with a narrow opening initially designed to dispense the cream with precise control.

The product consistency is pretty runny and the fact that the tube tip is cone-shaped does very little to halt or control the product from flowing out. On the contrary, storing the tube on its cap may result in severe leakage and loss of product.

Officially, there are 3 shades available. However, only 2 are made available in the Middle East. Light and Medium. Therefore, color-matching would be a hit and miss. The coverage ranges from medium to buildable. It applies smoothly and dries to an almost powder finish.

This Garnier BB cream comes with an additional SPF of 20 and retails for around AED 25 - 28 in the UAE.

Several reviews have stated that the product tends to oxidize (turn warmer/orange/darker) on the skin so users have been warned to be cautious.

Final conclusion and personal experience

I have to say that this product is not that bad for a drugstore brand. Upon first application, it feels incredibly light on the skin and matched rather well to my warm skin tone. It covered my hyper pigmentation fairly well although a tiny bit did peek through. It didn't sink into my pores and left my skin looking even-toned.

It dries off to a near matte finish with a slight sheen (or healthy glow). It does transfer if you rub your hands against it, so be aware. It isn't as long lasting as most foundations, but it doesn't slide off immediately either.
It is also affordable and easily accessible.

Overall, this product looks good on, applies very well and doesn't break me out whatsoever. It would be perfect on days I don't want to wear foundation and concealer. However, there is ONE reason I would not use this often.

It oxidizes.

Yep. It oxidized to a warmer, slightly orange tone on my skin. It wouldn't make a noticeable difference outdoors or during daylight. But once the lights come on and night falls, the difference is very obvious. And I personally dislike my face and neck being different colors.

Another peeve is the uncontrollable runny consistency and the packaging. I would assume this is why the tube is store on it's end rather on the cap in the box. Imagine if it were the other way around; users would encounter a huge mess upon first opening it.

In conclusion, this BB cream would work for someone who can match it. It's a great alternative to foundation. It's not a miracle product though, so don't rely on it.

And, as always, give your skin space to breathe.

Review: Ever Bilena Water Resistant Liquid eyeliner

Let's face it, most women can hardly step out the door without putting a touch of eyeliner. Why? Because it defines our eyes ever so well. But, at the end of the day, we want to avoid as much panda-eyes as possible - and this just doesn't work well with many eyeliners.

Browsing through Daiso, I came upon a brand well-known in the Philippines: Ever Bilena. There were foundations, blushes, eyeshadows and eyeliners. The product I was most excited about was the liquid eyeliner. And so, here's a review on the Ever Bilena Water-Resistant Liquid Eyeliner.

Product Packaging

The product comes in a black bottle with a long-handled cap. The brand and product name are inscribed on it in gold (this fades away with time and use). The entire package comes off as very simple in design. The brush itself is felt-tip and firm. The only part that 'bends' is the very tip. I believe this allows the user to better maneuver the brush when creating a wing.

The consistency is obviously liquid, yet not. It doesn't drip or run when applying or uncapping. Unfortunately, a ton of product collects on the brush when you use it. Besides that, the color is incredibly opaque and black. It glides on like a dream and doesn't cause any irritation or stinging.

Final conclusion and personal experience

So I took a gamble with this. It's always hit and miss with 'dirt cheap' products. Hesistant and cautious at first, it took me a week or so to finally try this out. And now I'm worried Daiso might stop stocking it.

The consistency of this eyeliner is liquid, yet slightly thick. Upon application, the color pay-off is very opaque. It isn't watered-down nor did it need another layer to intensify the color. It starts off as glossy and dries to a near matte finish. And it lasts all day. I am serious. After 10 hours, it's still there. No touch-ups.

It dries fairly quickly thus making it very easy to correct any mistake. When rubbed, the product flakes off instead of smudging. There is no evidence of black residue either which is a major plus.

The brush tip size and texture is one of the firsts I've tried. I rarely found an issue with the size during application. However, it has a tendency to be wide enough to keep bumping my lashes and coating them. (But it's no biggie.)

Now, to answer the question of whether it lives up to the claim of being 'water-resistant'.

Yes. Yes, it does. To an extent though.

As shown, it doesn't smudge or run under flowing water. There might be slight fading due to the pressure. It passed the water test with above average scores. However, it doesn't quite hold up if you decide to smudge it right away.

Do I like this product? Yes.

Would I repurchase? Already did.

Are there any cons against it? Only that the product gloops up too much on the wand and the brush. So messy and a waste.

Best feature(s) about it? Water-resistant, very inexpensive, opaque black pigment and does not give me black eyes at the end of the day.

Eyeliners are one of the few products I refuse to face the public without. Whether it's shadow, pencil, liquid or gel, it's an essential in my kit. Undefined Asian eyes just won't cut it.

But hey, if you can rock the naked eye, you go girl! (or guy)

-L



Disclaimer: This product may have undergone repackaging and may appear different on the Ever Bilena website. It may also be inaccessible to many unless bought off other sites. Apologies, but this is an awesome product. :)

Brushing it like pros - the essentials

Remember the time you bought your first eyeshadow pallet and the only tools at your disposal were the spongy applicators? Awesome at packing on color, but horrible for multiple uses and washes. Yep. Been there.

So down the road of self-education I learnt about the world of makeup brushes. So many types for numerous uses; it's very easy to get lost in the boundless choices. I'd find myself ogling at large sets, yearning to have them. Kind of excessive and unnecessary for a non-professional.

Stick to the Basics. Don't over-horde what you don't require.

(Had I known this, a certain drawer of unused brushes wouldn't have existed.)

Trial and error have aided me in narrowing down a small number of brushes I use daily. Pretty much Holy Grail quality, these brushes make makeup application (for me) flawless.

E.L.F Powder Brush - ($3 at eyeslipsface.com)

This brush is dense and incredibly soft. Absolutely no prickly feeling on the skin nor do the bristles splay out or shed. It has gone through the powder and liquid application trial and excelled. In my opinion, this brush is worth more than its current price, but that's also a reason why it's a MUST-HAVE.

Sigma Blending Brush E25 - ($12 at sigmabeauty.com)

As the creator intended, this is a dupe to the MAC 217. Soft white bristles that are packed, yet do a brilliant job of blending eyeshadows. It can give a sheer application on the lid if too much color isn't your thing. Personally, I don't own a 217, but this is still on my MUST-HAVE list.

Spoolie

I honestly don't know what my brows would do without this. I have fairly thick brows that like to splay out this way and that after showering. A spoolie brushes them back in place.

Mikyaji Eyeshadow Brush(es)

One of the very first brushes I owned - and definitely one of my favorites. It picks up color amazingly well and packs it on with as minimal fall out as possible. They come in varying sizes and I love the dense, stiffness for an opaque application.

Mikyaji Small Smudger Brush

This brush head is incredibly small and stiff - perfect for smudging eyeshahow or liner on the top and bottom lashline. It can also be used in detailed eyeshadow application. However, I use it for my gel liner. I can be as precise with the line and wing. Unfortunately, the gel clumps up the bristles after a while so I need to wash it.

5 brushes in total that make up my 'Essential Brushes' list. Only 5? Well, yes, for everyday use. Concealer, foundation, eyeliner and lipbalm. Period. (Eyeshadows for special occasions.)

Less is always more.

An essential brush list varies from person to person, naturally. You don't need the brushes on my list - you may not even need any brushes at all. Your fingers are your best tools. Effective, free of cost, easy to clean and travel friendly.

Yep. Less is definitely more.

-L

Some pictures want words.

He sang to her a song of fire, she a song of ice. 

And every dragon she bore in heat, he slayed with shards of cold. 

Neither gave in. 

But fused together a melody. 

Now they freeze us with their flame. 

“I’ll suck your soul out.”
"I'll drag you down with me."
"I'll fly away."
A human approached.
A shutter snapped, froze the frame, glued the butterfly to the flower.
"Fly away then."

"Will Santa come with presents tonight, Mummy?"

"Only if you're a good boy and sleep early, darling."
Santa never made it in time.
And so we stopped believing.

The sight enraptures us to its beauty;

The greenery and molding of our Earth.

Yet beneath the bewitching image,

We overlook the essence of its birth.

And she gazed upon the distant heavens; the sparkling gems of the sky. 

Nothing obscured her sight. 

Nothing called for her attention. 

She was drawn into the abyss of this glittering spectacle; she fell into the wonder of our lives and our world. 

What a glorious fall it was.

How would the light touch my soul, if I cover my body?

How would the stars feel my skin, if I coat my flesh?

How would I be free, if I live like you.

Battle weary as the years fly by,

Facing the wither and wear of life alone.
Despite many warm lights shining upon you,
You, my warrior, have a heart of stone.

The cheerful laughter that filled its halls,
The happy family that dwelled within.
Now plants slither against its walls.
But those joyful echoes never dimmed.

There is little that can behold the wonders of Mother Nature than the human eye.
Moreover, there is little that can exaggerate that same wonder than the camera lens.


Photo credits: M
Text credits: M & L

A collaboration by M & L